Monday, June 19, 2006

This I Know

Here are a few things I have learned thus far in this motherhood gig that nobody told me. If they did, I either wasn't paying attention or didn't believe them.

I have bought more ketchup in one year with children than I ever bought all the previous years of my life combined. And I never intended for ketchup to even pass the sweet lips of my child .

The perfect gift on any child's first birthday should be a cow. This is because milk is ALWAYS on my grocery list. No, really: ALWAYS. If I had a cow at home, think of the gas I'd save.

Most of those multiple hundreds of dollars I spent on childproofing the home when the Critter became mobile was rendered completely wasted once he was toilet trained.

Silence from a room with multiple children usually means that something is drastically wrong.

The love really does grow exponentially.

Thanks to my sons' obsession with all things mechanical, I can identify each and every type of truck, all pieces of heavy equipment of any sort, and am able to spot them at 200 yards. I also feel compelled to point them out to unsuspecting adult passengers riding with me, or to the air if I happen to be alone. I have found this equally true if I am in own car or in someone else's: "Look! A skid steer!"

They really are all different.

Contrary to what you would think, the person you know who is toilet training a toddler will have the cleanest bathroom in a one-mile radius. This is because that bathroom will have to be cleaned completely after each and every trip the child makes to the facilities.

'Shoots a little left' will have a whole new meaning for you, if you have boys.

What I have on my plate, MUST be better than what is on a child's plate, even if it is the exact.same.thing. I have yet to figure out what age my children must reach before I will be able to eat all of my own meal again.

The days I wake up early, feeling good, and get up to steal some time for myself or to get a jump on the day are invariably the days that at least one child wakes up 45 minutes earlier than normal.

Some days seem so very long, but my babies are growing up faster than I ever imagined possible.


Blogger Kami said...

Take comfort - under the Reagen administration, ketchup became a vegetable.

And also take comfort in that when the girl is potty training, it will be cleaner, but then scarier in public.

4:50 PM  
Blogger Carrie said...

The one about the cow is hillarious! I too, have increased my knowledge about construction equipment from being around my nephew. It is so embarassing when I point something out to one of my friends. 'Look, that's a real big digger'... I think a few of them think I have a drug problem. :) Great pictures!

5:48 PM  
Blogger Tx Mom said...

What a beautiful and funny post.

9:28 PM  
Blogger Amy said...

Fantastic pic with the hose.

So funny, I happened to be up early today and was enjoying some early morning blog visiting for about three minutes when my littlest came to the top of the stairs with her hair all wonky. SO TRUE that this is when they decide to get up early.

Motherhood. Sigh.

6:47 AM  
Blogger The Kept Woman said...

That last part is oh-so-true. It would be so easy for me to get sucked into the "let's just have one more" thing when I go back and look at how fast my babies grew up...

7:10 AM  
Blogger Mainline Mom said...

Great post. I will have to remember these things.

7:21 AM  
Blogger Tee said...

So true! What a great post. I love the photos. (You're template is really nice, too.)

9:27 AM  
Blogger Lori said...

Silence from a room full of kids, is so, so true.

11:56 AM  
Anonymous shirley said...

What I have on my plate, MUST be better than what is on a child's plate...

I also learned that I will never eat a truly hot home-cooked meal again. By the time, I sit down(which is the last person to sit down for a meal btw), one of the children are finished and of course need help doing 'something' in the kitchen that cannot be accomplished without my guidance!

2:22 PM  

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