Thursday, July 20, 2006

Correspondence

bathblue


Dear Brodie Lane HEB:

Hello. I do my weekly marketing at your store, sometimes multiple times during a seven day period. I have yet to make it out of your doors after a trip for less than $150, many times more. But that is not what this letter is about, as you really do have the best prices in town, and I love so many things about your store: dedicated 'shopper with child' parking, carts holding up to 3 children, clean floors, fresh produce, the list goes on and on.

Back to those shopping carts. We were very excited over your recent purchase of the new carts with the bench seat holding two children. My sons deemed them 'more comfy' than the old, red plastic carts. I'm sure you are aware that anything that makes the trip more pleasant for them trickles down to me, the one with the wallet. I understand that those old red ones were recalled for some reason or other, but if you insist on taking them out of service you really should purchase more of the new ones. Or at least get some hourly worker with a screwdriver to fix the 6 broken ones that Ramon, your friendly parking lot attendant, reported were in the back of your store. Yes, I asked, and that's what he told me. Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter.

Sincerely,
Mama McAustin, who will check the parking lot next time, and move on to the NEW store if there aren't any appropriate carts available


To Brodie Lane HEB customer #1:

Good afternoon. I would like to compliment you on the restraint toward your sons that you exercised while grocery shopping this morning. I'm not sure I would have been quite as patient (read: oblivious) with your boys as you were in the store today. I noticed your two adorable sons as they were pushing and shoving each other to get onto the bench seat of the shopping cart in the parking lot. I imagine it's hard to shop while having to constantly chase after a 5 year old who is in pursuit of his 7 year old brother. I got tired just watching. I also got tired of telling my 3 year old that we couldn't use your cart, even though no one was riding on it. I was however, very happy you were able to secure a cart that provided a comfy place for them to rest once they were worn out from wreaking havoc in the aisles. Those new carts are really nice, aren't they? I hope the rest of your afternoon runs a bit more smoothly, and that those grape jelly stains from jar that your younger son broke come out of the seemingly-new white tennis shoes he was wearing. Have a great day!

Sincerely,
The mother of the 2 year old your older son knocked over


To Brodie Lane HEB customer #2:

Hi, do you remember me? I was the woman with the two toddlers and the infant whom you were walking behind in the parking lot. On the way into the store, at around 11 this morning? Hello, again.

I really appreciated it when you told your pre-teen son to "Hurry! Go get the last one!" and sent him running past us to snag that final cart built to hold multiple children. Yeah, I heard you. I realize that at 10 it's really taxing to walk through an entire store using your own steam. Also, I'm sure the infant you had with you just adored the straight back and hard seat on that cart. I just wanted to let you know that my shopping trip went well, and I was able to get almost all the groceries on my list despite having to spend more time in the store doing things other than getting groceries. My dog really needs to lose a few pounds anyway, and my sons thoroughly enjoyed helping me choose items and put them in the cart.

Another thing. Yes, I was laughing at your embarrassment when your son threw that complete and total screaming hissy fit tantrum when you wouldn't buy him those gummy worms in the checkout lane because he hadn't finished his flaming hot Cheetos. I'm fairly certain that was God getting you back for your inhospitable actions earlier in the day. And also? Maybe if he wore shoes, he wouldn't get the shards of glass from the broken jar of grape jelly in his feet.
Have a wonderful afternoon.

Cordially,
the HEB shopper who shopped the entire store directly in front of you

10 Comments:

Blogger Tx Mom said...

These are the most awesome letters ever! I hear the new HEB in Circle C is very very nice.

5:01 PM  
Blogger speckledpup said...

what a doll you are.

craziness isn't it?

and people are just so inconsiderate.

My oldest three were in the same age grouping as your sweeties...the line that struck me was "my toddlers enjoyed helping me my sons thoroughly enjoyed helping me choose items and put them in the cart"..... oh I can read that line with clarity. Believe me.

5:01 PM  
Blogger Cara said...

Yeah, you really should go check out the new HEB in Circle C. It's very nice, has wider aisles and lots of kids carts.

The only thing they don't have that I miss from the Brodie store is the 'shopper with child' parking. However, there are always so many shoppers with children in that store that they'd have to dedicate the entire parking lot to that! I do, however, wish that they had "stork parking" like some Randalls stores have...so that in a few months when I'm big and fat I don't have to walk all the way across the lot.

At the new HEB, the checkers ask me every time if I want help out with my groceries. When I was pregnant with Payton and shopping at the Brodie HEB I was asked a grand total of TWO times if I needed help out - and both times it was by young teenage girls. Unacceptable in my book.

5:13 PM  
Blogger MMC said...

Thank you Pup and Tx Mom.

And Cara and Tx Mom, I did the run last week at the new circle c store b/c I'd heard from friends that it was so nice. And it is, I really like it. It's also another 10 minutes south of the other one that's already 15 min. south of my house. When I've got cranky, tired kids ready for a nap and frozen food in this horrid heat, those extra minutes make the difference.

I may have to make the switch anyway, b/c their nifty new seats have space in the cart for 2 (like at Costco), as well as the bench seat for two: it gives me options:)

9:44 PM  
Blogger Carrie said...

Sounds like an enjoyable trip to the grocery store. :P

No shoes in a grocery store? Ick.

10:20 AM  
Blogger TBG said...

It is already enough work to get little ones to the store with you it would be nice if the stores made it a little easier for the parents out there.

Nice letters

11:11 AM  
Blogger Mama C said...

Too funny. I feel your pain. Some people just need to slow down and chill. Help out a mom!

May your next trip be blissful.

1:16 PM  
Blogger Kami said...

WAIT.

He couldn't get the gummy worms because he hadn't finished his CHEETOS?

Poor kid. So very mistreated.

5:18 PM  
Blogger Tee said...

LOL! This post was highly entertaining! Loved it.

10:52 PM  
Blogger Mainline Mom said...

OMG you poor thing. My friend dcrmom with the three kids gets all her groceries home delivered now. Maybe that would be a good option for you? I only have one kid and I've considered it!

2:59 PM  

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